Renee Baker, Ph.D.EE, LPC

Story by Renee Baker, Edge Publications, Aug. 28, 2008.

Far from the starting line, the Gender, Education, Advocacy & Resources program (GEAR) is now in overdrive. The Resource Center of Dallas program began in March of 2006, with just a handful of transgender individuals sharing the desire to provide support to the greater gender community. In just a couple of short years, they have skyrocketed into brand new gender zones.

Marla Compton is an Evening Center Services Coordinator at RCD, one of the largest LGBT centers in the nation. She is one of the founding members of GEAR and now serves as the GEAR Coordinator. Compton, who is very active in the gender community, says “There was not a cohesive program for the transgender community in Dallas. There have been other groups, but none with the backing of a strong non-profit organization like the Resource Center.”

The GEAR program has two major components – Transgender Health Night and Transgender Services. Transgender Health Night is held monthly at the Nelson-Tebedo Clinic and provides health services to any transgender individual. These services include low-cost hormone replacement therapy lab work and access to medical staff in an accepting environment. Lab work is especially critical for those transitioning from one gender to another, as hormone levels must be closely monitored. Tests often can run from several hundred dollars to well over $1,000 and the clinic has been able to keep costs to just $80.

The Transgender Health Night program is managed by Michael Marr and staffed by Dr. Jaime Vasquez, both of whom have been presented with the Henry Ramirez Ally Award for their leadership and dedication to the transgender community. “Denise”, a transgender woman who prefers not to be identified, said she found the clinic staff and Vasquez so understanding and helpful, that she dropped her other full-time doctor. She said the GEAR program, including the Transgender Health Night program, gave her the impetus needed to begin her journey on becoming Denise.
Compton also credits Jessica Davis for the success of the Transgender Health Night. She said Davis also received an award, the Katherine Walton Award, for her services. “If it were not for her outreach and leadership, there would be no trans health night,” said Compton. Compton also credits the 15 volunteers, transgendered and allied, that make the GEAR program successful.

The Transgender Services of GEAR has several elements including a monthly mixer, which may bring in anywhere from 15 to 80 individuals. Mixers are held at restaurants, clubs and the Center itself. The goal of the mixer is to provide community among transgender individuals, friends, family and allies.

Tori Van Fleet, a Forensic Scientist for the Fort Worth Police Department, is very grateful for the GEAR program and drives to Dallas to attend mixers regularly. Van Fleet says that GEAR “helped me to get out of my house and into the public as Tori…if it had not been for GEAR in those days, I don’t think I would have had the courage to walk through the doors at work.” Van Fleet has now had her gender-related surgeries and says she feels complete, thanks to her friends at GEAR.

GEAR’s Transgender Services also include diversity training for the general public and corporations. Michael “Mo” Snow, who has been attending GEAR since its beginning, feels the educational aspects of GEAR are its most important part. Snow says that education and advocacy go hand-in-hand and GEAR is fostering a better understanding of the transgender community.
Snow says, “It is human nature for people to fear what they don’t understand,” and GEAR bridges that gap of the unknown. As an example, he said GEAR called a town-hall meeting with the Dallas HRC Chapter to discuss the impact of changes to the well-known ENDA bill, which dropped protection for gender variant individuals. He said this meeting alone brought an understanding of the need for equality when it comes to health care, jobs, fair workplace treatment and freedom from harassment.
GEAR’s Transgender Services also include a helpline, which serves up to 20 callers per week, and a support group called GEAR Rap.

Overall, Compton says, “I am very proud of what we have been able to accomplish in such a short space of time.” She says, “GEAR is a tool. It is a tool to build a new life. It is available to anyone. There are simply no requirements to reap the benefits of this program.”
The GEAR program is now putting out a call to the gender community, to help assess what its needs are.

If you would like to participate in the assessment, would like to volunteer for GEAR, or would like to learn more about the GEAR program, please see the Resource Center website at www.rcdallas.org.

Story by Renee Baker, Edge Publications, Aug 21, 2008.

For Juan Miguel Aguirre, Oak Lawn is “Our Town.” It is the place the Dallas gay community can claim as its own piece of the pie, and to claim a piece of respect. Aguirre came out to his family at the age of 14 – an experience he calls a tragedy. Luckily, he found a safe haven in Oak Lawn. It meant so much to him that he wanted to give back to this community, by using his gift as an artist.

Yesterday he finished a project that’s sure to brighten up his favorite neighborhood. He donated his time and money to produce One Human Family, a giant rainbow mural covering the northwest side of the entire Nelson-Tebedo clinic on Cedar Springs Blvd. Centered in the mural many diverse faces representing all of humanity are Bill Nelson and Terry Tebedo, two pillars of the Dallas gay community. You can’t miss the mural driving through the Gayborhood now, while perhaps wondering what was there before.

The idea of the mural sprang to life when Aguirre and his partner Raphael Lauraeno were vacationing in Florida. They were driving through Key West when they were surprised to see an equality bumper sticker on the side of a big, old pickup truck. In boldface, it read “One Human Family”. They were so struck by those words that they couldn’t let the idea go.

Aguirre, who holds an associate’s degree in design and merchandising, felt he had to somehow make an impact. As he walked the streets near Cedar Springs, he kept thinking something was needed for the “whole gay area, something to make it stand out and be a beacon for the whole community.” He wanted all people to know “they are welcome to our community, that it is a community, and deserves a certain level of respect.”

Aguirre also wanted something that represented all people. He said as you walk the streets of Oak Lawn, you see a great diversity – young and old, rich and poor, and differing levels of education. “I wanted to portray that in my mural.”

The location for the mural became obvious. Aguirre says the Nelson-Tebedo clinic is a “gateway” point to the community. When he learned how special these two heroes were, the project became “something more.” At that point, he realized this work would be done for free, part of his heart work. Aguirre donated over two weeks of his time and all of the paint and supplies.

But the project almost never got off the ground and was a close call. Aguirre came to the Nelson-Tebedo clinic to pitch his idea, but he accidentally brought the wrong art portfolio. The one he brought was empty, except way at the back there was still one mural, which just happened to be an award-winning mural at the La Piazza del Arte Chalk Festival in Denver, Colorado. They loved it and he got his chance.

The Resource Center of Dallas embraced the idea of the mural, but before pressing ahead, they wanted to make sure the Cedar Springs Merchants Association had its say. Rafael McDonnell, Strategic Communication and Program Manager for the Resource Center, says “we wanted to make sure everyone was part of the whole process. This is our heart. This is our core. And we want everyone on board.” They contacted Scott Whittall, President of the Merchants Association, and made sure they had his blessing.
McDonnell says when they looked at the original proposal, they were struck by it. “I think it has turned out wonderful. It has exceeded our expectations.” He says when you drive past it, it is a thing of inspiration. And not only that, when you fly over head, you can look down and see where the Gayborhood is in Dallas now.

Aguirre says he hopes his mural does indeed inspire and has hopes that this is a positive attraction for the community. He hopes we can all recognize that we are indeed, just One Human Family.

To contact the artist and see more of his work or commission a mural, visit his website at www.jma-designs.com. To learn more about the Nelson-Tebedo Clinic, visit the Resource Center of Dallas at www.rcdallas.org. You may see the mural at 4012 Cedar Springs Road in Dallas. Oh, and if you are still wondering, the scene on the wall, prior to the mural, was that of a scenic castle.

For the full story plus comments, please go here.

Edge Publication by Renee Baker, Aug. 20, 2008.

Coming Out

Who am I? Who are you? When am I not I and you not you? Why are we not ourselves? Why do we hide? What happens when we reveal ourselves or not allow others to do the same? What impact does this have on our well-being? In other words, what is this business of being in a closet all about?

Feleshia Porter, a Licensed Professional Counselor in private practice, says we all have choices in life to make and one that is ever present is whether or not to allow people to see us as we really are. If not, then we remain a mystery to them.

Porter counsels those dealing with gender and sexuality concepts of self that don’t fit the “norms” of our culture. Most of her clients have to come out as a natural part of their growth process. She says that coming out is really about being comfortable with who you are and not being afraid of others knowing who you are. She says “coming out” is really a symbolic term, “one of coming from a hiding position to an open position…it is descriptive of stepping out into the world.”

Porter says when coming out, we have to carefully consider our own motivation for doing so. She says, “What is really important about the process is to be in a good place yourself. Coming out should not be done for validation of self from others.” In other words, she says coming out is not about trying to “make ourselves okay”, but about being more authentic and becoming closer to people. It is about breaking down the mystery so that others can trust us and we begin to trust them.

Porter says too, that when we are okay with ourselves, then the reactions others have to coming out will be more about them than us. “Don’t take reactions from people personally,” she says. However, she says it is important to be considerate of others’ potential feelings and think about how we want to come out, such as in person or by email, and when it would be good timing and so on.

Porter says reactions to coming out can vary quite a bit from family to family. More than anything, she says the more people are educated about gender and sexuality, the more accepting they generally are. But she says we can’t always be certain of how others react. Even the most anti-gay people can end up being your strongest ally. Coming out to them makes them re-evaluate their beliefs and they may have a complete turnaround. Sometimes it makes them question their own identity as well, not something many are ready to do. Porter also reminds us we are not the only one that has to come out, that our families themselves will have coming out issues as well.

But why come out at all? Porter says many people live compartmentalized lives and that takes up an enormous amount of energy. She says coming out allows us to have real relationships and not coming out really just prolongs the existing state – which is not having real relationships. So your choice is to risk the loss of inauthentic relationships in hopes of having real and meaningful relationships. She says the only way to stop worrying is to face our fears and begin to learn how to loosen up our boundaries. We have to have courage to be ourselves.

Porter recommends those coming out to seek the support of others that are like themselves. She says it helps to listen to their stories as we shape our own, but we should personalize the stories we hear to ourselves, yet not losing ourselves in our story making. Porter says it is in connecting to others like ourselves, that we are able to “normalize” our own path. She says we often feel like the “only person on the planet” to feel like we do and that we must be crazy. “It is a natural process and there is not something wrong with me.”

Porter says that in coming out, her clients find they are in better physical health. They sleep better. They have less anxiety. And because they have more meaning in their lives, they take better care of themselves. They have learned to accept themselves and to be okay with others too. She says, “Even if others reject us, we still have to accept them for where they are at in their own growth.”
Porter says, in the end, “It’s good to be ourselves…a place of peace.”

To contact Porter, you may reach her on her website at www.feleshiaporter.com.

For full story and comments, please see this link.

Edge Publications Story by Renee Baker, August 14, 2008.

Steven Pace radiates stillness. He is one of the few who has heard the calling to walk among the suffering and bring them peace. He’s too humble to know what a great man he is. He is a shining example of how one small human being can make a huge impact on the lives of others. It is an honor to share but a small piece of his story.
Pace, age 56, is the executive director of the AIDS Interfaith Network (AIN). He is a counselor, a minister, an administrator. He walks the talk and gives you chills of spirit down your spine and tears of gold in your eyes. You will never see the face of AIDS again in the same way, after talking to Steven Pace. You can’t.

The year 1982 was a turning point for Pace. He broke up with his partner Michael, who moved to San Francisco. Pace remained living here in Dallas, but of the couple, only Pace remained alive. “He must have knew [he had AIDS],” said Pace, “before we broke up. Within a year [of his move], he was dead.” Realizing what was just said, we paused for a moment to honor the grief of those words.
It was in 1982 that we began to hear of AIDS, but Pace reminds us that it was called GRID then, for Gay Related Immune Disease. It was an unfortunate naming, as AIDS is not a gay disease, and so the stigma against gay men became a stigma against the disease, and even religion looked the other way.

The Metropolitan Community Church (MCC) did not. When someone needed help, MCC was the first place they would call on. “MCC was instrumental in HIV work,” said Pace, who was a student clergy member at the time. “For many years, religion shut its doors. Everyone was struggling then. And anyone that stepped forth to help was stigmatized for helping.”

Pace said in 1985, three other churches came forth including the Methodists, Catholics and Episcopalians. But he said many lost membership because of it. “St. Thomas the Apostle Episcopal was very welcoming of the gay community. But soon they were inundated with HIV cases, and membership began to dwindle.”

Blake Peery, a development manager at AIN, agrees that even today, people that help are still stigmatized. He says nonprofit workers are frequently assumed to have AIDS themselves.

To try and overcome the stigma, AIN was formed with the purpose of finding pastors willing to listen and willing to lend their name in vocal support of the seminal AIDS community. Not all pastors and church members felt they could openly participate in AIDS care, but they could do so behind the scenes as part of the Buddy Project.
The Buddy Project was originally started at the Oak Lawn Counseling Center in 1983 to foster the care of AIDS clients by “well” clients. Pace said the Buddy Project was there to help even with the most basic of care, such as bringing food to clients. It was just such a time of serving food that Pace had a spiritual calling.

While Pace interned at MCC, one of his duties was to minister to AIDS clients at Parkland Hospital. Pace said Parkland had been forced to setup an AIDS clinic and take action. For months, they stood in picket lines calling for action and compassion from the community. “There were buses arriving every day from all over [Texas] and people were dumped in Dallas,” said Pace. He says the city had a great big problem and Parkland had to do something.
Pace said the fear of contraction was huge and AIDS patients would clear an entire emergency room. When he ministered to AIDS clients in the hospital, he would find their food trays left in the hallway. It was one such time that Pace opened a room to find a young man, who looked up at him, and started to cry. “I was simply willing to bring him his food,” said Pace. Suddenly Pace, who had his own fears, was not afraid of this young man.
“I reached out and took his hand. The minute I took his hand I knew I was okay. And I knew, at that moment, that AIDS was going to be my life for awhile.” It was a deep spiritual calling and Pace, Peery and I sit with teary eyes for a moment, because we knew it was a huge turning point in Pace’s life. It was one of those moments when it all makes sense and we recognize and affirm what our gifts are.

Pace says there is something inside each and every one of us that prompts us to “seek out.” He remembers sadly a time when he recalled almost every friend he ever had, had died of AIDS. He had to do anything to help others and help others “not to get this.” He says all we really need to use our lives in the service of others.

Pace does what he does in remembrance as well. “I do this for all of them…those that died.” says Pace. Pace remembers especially his former partner Michael. He can still see a posthumous image of him, glowing, radiant and healthy – a silhouette of a strong red-headed man walking along the beaches of Galveston. It was as if his angel came to see him one day, to bless the Path that Pace is on. These are Golden moments – little winks from God – that Pace shares with tears in his eyes.

Pace says those early days were truly exhausting, and as part of his ministry, he was doing 15 to 20 memorial services per week. He felt relief when he only had one funeral service in a day. He says he was deeply embroiled in the effort, but felt there was no choice, as “no one was lining up to help”.

“There was a lot of hatred back then”, says Pace. He said when landlords found out you had HIV, you were often thrown out and all of your belongings were literally thrown onto the lawn. To make matters worse, your belongings would then be stolen.

That hatred came in picket lines too. Pace was the first “well” person to be hired to work at Ewing Center, one of the housing programs operating since 1987 as part of AIDS Services of Dallas. The Center’s existence was protested in South Dallas by angry residents holding signs that read “Keep Oak Cliff Clean and Healthy” and “No gays-No AIDS colonies.”

Pace says, “For a whole year, they tried to get Ewing House to go away.” He said they screamed at him and they threatened him. He was fearful of being killed, but continued to be available 24/7. Pace said ambulances would come by weekly and technicians would dump people on the lawn, leaving even their gloves and scrubs behind. He said, “Baylor [hospital] was the worst, but it was all of them.”

Pace worked hard to help hospitals and doctors come to terms with their fear of AIDS. He would speak regularly in training rooms and auditoriums, to as many as 300 people at a time, trying to reduce the fear of contraction. “I have breathed the same air as persons with AIDS, touched them and held them…I have had their vomit on me, their blood on me…and nothing happened.” Even with all of this, doctors didn’t like to take Pace seriously, but they could not dismiss one thing – that Pace was there and Pace was safe.

Pace said it took celebrities like Elizabeth Taylor and Princess Diana to show that AIDS was not as contagious as it was deemed to be. Taylor founded the Elizabeth Taylor AIDS foundation in 1991. Princess Di was known for publicly touching those with AIDS.

Pace says that working with HIV is not easy and it takes faith to walk this walk. “I feel as willed to this, as I did to being in the ministry”, says Pace. He also says though you don’t see the death and dying so much as we saw then, there is still a great deal of suffering. And the stigma is still here. It is not the same, but it is still here.

Pace says HIV is again on the rise. “Most students today are no longer aware of Ryan White. And HIV marketing is making kids think they can just take a pill to cure themselves.”

Both Pace and Peery encourage people to come forth and help. “However you can, use your life” says Pace. “When people let themselves get connected, they will be changed in some way,” he says. Peery says he once overlooked people with AIDS himself. “Things are pretty here in the South. I never looked at such things as the homeless before. But now, I see my clients at stoplights.” He adds, “No longer could those in need be invisible to me.”
Pace spends most of his time now performing administrative duties at the AIN center, which serves close to 2000 clients with HIV/AIDS. He enjoys spending time with Duane, his partner of over 20 years, and finding meaning and joy in the simple day to day activities of their lives.

If you would like to know more about AIDS Interfaith Network or would like to make a donation, please see their website at www.aidsinterfaithnetwork.org. Pace ministers today at the Greater Dallas MCC church and their website is http://www.mccgd.org.

For the full story and comments, see this link (deleted link and photo).

Edge Publication Story by Renee Baker, Aug. 1, 2008.

Dallas Bears

Many of my ancestral grandfathers were lumberjacks. They migrated to the woodlands of New Brunswick and worked in the forests, sending rough-cut lumber back to Scotland to build ships for the royal navy. These men were hairy, not very clean or well built, and had to deal with the harshness of nature, including encounters
with bears in the wild.

In our rainbow community today, we associate our “Bears” with these lumberjacks of yesteryears, though today we call them loggers. We assume our Bears are all stout, strong and particularly hirsute men. But Mack
Williamson, president of Dallas Bears, says it is more than that. And it is more than a dominant/sub-dominant culture too. He says being a Bear really “comes from within” and is about being part of a brotherhood of
those who identify as such. It’s about bonding and fellowship, not so much how well one fits the stereotypical physical traits.

The Dallas Bears are no doubt givers, and they care about the community and each other. When they greet each other, they offer a bear hug and maybe a bear call too. In a roomful of Bears, you can definitely feel the love. The
Dallas Bears recently celebrated their 15th Annual Membership and Awards Banquet, a night of celebration held at an appropriate venue, Celebration Restaurant in Dallas.

Their celebration was not just about honoring the changing of the board of directors, but also to honor several nonprofit organizations in the Dallas community. The Dallas Bears raised over $25,000 this past year, and distributed it between four worthy organizations: AIDS Services of Dallas ($6,000), AIDS Interfaith Network ($6,000), The Turtle Creek Chorale AIDS Fund ($1,000) and
Youth First Texas ($13,000).

The 60+ members of the Bear organization vote on which organizations receive the funding. Youth First Texas received funding, Williams says, because “it is very important to the Bears that we help bring up the next generation.” The Dallas Bears feel close to Youth First Texas and meet at their center once a month on third Saturdays. AIDS organizations are also of great importance to the Dallas Bears. “We do have members that are positive and we all have lost friends and relatives to AIDS.” The Bears feel that they are able to help fill a void where the government is not able to help. “We take care of our
own of course,” Williamson says, “but it is important for us to help the greater community.”

The Turtle Creek Chorale itself has lost about 150 members thus far to AIDS. In the greater community, more than 34,000 people are living with AIDS in Texas today and over half of those cases are due to male-to-male sexual
contact, according to the Center for Disease Control.

With all that the Dallas Bears do, they have chosen their motto for the year to be “Brothers Making Memories.” Williamson says, “It is not just memories for us, but memories for others too.”

The Dallas Bears largely raise their donation fund through the Texas Bear Round Up, the third largest bear run in the country. The next gathering is not until March of 2009, but the Bears will hold a fundraiser September 27th at Illusions, on Maple Avenue in Dallas. This will be a
turnabout show featuring Bears in DRAG, a show sure to tickle your funny bone and raise a smile at the good cause. So do mark your calendars!

This weekend many of the Dallas Bears will head to the Round-Up Saloon for the Man Candy party. Even Bears have a sweet tooth!

On August 16 they will have their monthly membership meeting at Youth First Texas.

For more information on the Dallas Bears and their social activities, visit their website at www.dallasbears.org or join them for each weekend for coffee at the Crossroads Market at 3930 Cedar Springs Rd in Dallas from 10:00 a.m. to noon on Sunday mornings. Just look for the table full of lumberjacks!

For the full story with comments, see this link.

Edge Publication Story by Renee Baker, Friday Jul 25, 2008.

Dancing is Cynthia Schepps’ prevailing passion in life, so it’s no surprise that she was alarmed upon learning her favorite dance event was going to end. Instead of accepting it, she decided to step forward and provide new leadership. As a result, she saved the Once In a Blue Moon Dance, Dallas’ women-only monthly dance event.

The “Blue Moon” is hosted every second Saturday, and has been under Schepps’ wing since 2000. It was back then when the producer announced the dance was ending due to its labor intensive nature.

Schepps was outside on the patio with other women who told her, “We don’t want it to stop. If you produce it, we will support you.” With seven volunteers backing her, Schepps said she would try it, and here she is eight years later with 100 dances to her credit.

It is really Schepps’ love of dance that keeps her producing. “I have been dancing since I was an egg,” she says. “For me, dancing is a body experience. It’s me and the music.” Schepps says when she dances, she becomes one with the music and from there movement is created and she enters “the zone.” The Blue Moon provides the accompanying twilight.

Schepps just loves the energy of dancing with other women. She says the Blue Moon has an “energy presence” that you can feed off of. The line dancers and country western dancers are truly fabulous, she says, and flirtatious too. The DJ’s mix of music is not just country, but also disco and the popular hits of today.
Schepps doesn’t mind dancing alone either, and often prefers it. She encourages others to dance like nobody is watching. She said 25 years ago she was one of the first dancers to dance alone at clubs. When a man would come up to her and ask if she wanted to dance, she would smile and reply, “I am dancing.”

The Blue Moon takes place near White Rock Lake at the DanceMasters Ballroom, owned by award-winning dance instructor Pat Thorpe. It’s primarily held as a safe, non-smoking alternative to the bar scene for lesbians, but is welcoming to straight women as well.

Schepps is grateful to Thorpe for his generosity over the years, and says she eventually “made him an honorary lesbian.”

Schepps is also full of gratitude toward the community as well, and generally donates the proceeds of the dances to numerous community organizations.

About 100 women attend each dance.

Valery Guignon, a local Dallas artist, has been attending the Blue Moon since its inception. She says not only has she met many friends, but she met her girlfriend at the dance. “Girl watching is one of my favorite parts of the Blue Moon Dance. I usually come early, dance till midnight, drink lots of water and have a few beers with my friends.”

Brenda Stowe, a concrete truck driver and long term dancer, agrees that the Blue Moon is a great way to meet people and have fun. “The first time I went to the Blue Moon I only knew one person,” she says, “[but] before the night was over I was invited to join two birthday parties!” Stowe often volunteers to help set up the dance.
Schepps, who is an accountant and bookkeeper by trade, hopes to expand the Blue Moon someday with a dream of having her own ballroom. “One that is just ours,” she says.

The next Blue Moon is this Saturday, August 9th, from 7 p.m. to Midnight at Dance Masters Ballroom at 10675 Northwest Highway in Dallas. It is for ladies only and has an entry fee of $10. For more information, visit www.once-in-a-blue-moon.org.

For full story and comments, see this link.

Edge Publication Story by Renee Baker, July 17, 2008.

My 21-year-old son once asked me, “Do we really need a gay bingo?” He wondered why we needed a “Separate but Equal” bingo, and why can’t we all just get along? My answer was “Yes,” of course we “need” a gay bingo. As best I could, I explained that it not only financially supports community services, but it also is a bridge between our different communities…and now he gets it.

Let’s get this straight: Gaybingo is not just bingo. Gaybingo is an extravaganza, with bingo thrown in for good measure. Each third Saturday of the month, 15 entertainers and 30 to 40 volunteers build a fabulous show around a different outrageous theme and set. To boot, 100% of the proceeds benefit the Resource Center of Dallas, whose mission is to provide programs and services to the LGBT community as well as to those affected by HIV/AIDS.

Gaybingo turns seven years old this month, two months before the Center itself turns 25. In celebration, this month’s theme was chosen to be something big and something gay – musicals. Live! at Gaybingo will feature Broadway showstoppers and numbers from shows like Chicago and Cats, complete with music and dancing. And how could they pull that and 15 rounds of bingo off without a few drag queens?

The show this Saturday is hosted by drag veterans Patti Le Plae Safe and Jenna Skyy, and features the crowd-pleasing BVDs (Bingo Verifying Dudes and Divas). The entertainment is by “Something Fabulous!!!”, a Dallas-based performance/activist group that recently appeared in the auditions for the NBC national television show, America’s Got Talent.

Each month there’s also a surprise local celebrity, and this time we’re letting the cat out of the bag: this month’s guest is red-headed radio diva Kellie Rasberry, best known for her work at KISS-FM on the nationally-syndicated Kidd Kraddick In The Morning Show.

A sold-out crowd of 400 is not uncommon at Gaybingo, and its best advertising is word of mouth. Kari Logan, a vice-president at CitiBank and also the AIDS Arms LifeWalk volunteer of the year, attends every month and brings an entourage with her from Lewisville. “I love Gaybingo!” she says, “But can we chat later? I’m in the middle of game six.” Logan, in good spirits, sat in the front row and didn’t mind getting drawn into a friendly dauber fight with her buddies.

Each Gaybingo is produced by Henry Ramirez, who is the Center Programs Manager for the RCD. It’s an understatement to say he’s Mr. Gaybingo. Ramirez started volunteering at RCD back in 1994, and joined full time a few years ago.

To get a team of 50 people together each month is no easy task. I suspect his secret to garnering such a supportive collaboration is his charm and his sincerity. He believes in what he does for the Center and that sense of meaning emanates from him. You can’t help but become a believer too.

Gaybingo started out small in the Center caf� seven years ago. It quickly grew and the production was moved to the Lakewood Theatre off Gaston Avenue, for a period of about six years. This past January, Gaybingo was moved to The Rose Room at Station 4, owned by Caven Enterprises, in Oak Lawn.

“Caven is awesome,” Ramirez says. “We’re like family with them. They have been a very big supporter of us for years, and they really stepped up to the plate.” Caven not only offered Gaybingo a free space to hold the monthly fundraiser, but also made adjustments to their stage lighting to accommodate the needs of the show. Holding Gaybingo at Station 4 also benefits the local Oak Lawn economy. Ramirez says having several hundred people come on a Saturday night certainly increases revenue at restaurants, bars and stores in the area.

Gaybingo also encourages a broader sense of community. Rosemarie Odom, a board member of the Resource Center, says Gaybingo gives the straight community a chance to meet members of the gay community in a safe and fun environment. “Gaybingo is a place where gay people can take their families and friends,” she says, and overcome some of the anxiety related to having a gay family member.
Another benefit of the gathering, she adds, is that it gives both the straight community, as well as the gay community, a chance to meet transgender individuals on common ground. Ramirez includes many transgender individuals as volunteers and performers as he considers them a “big part” of his family.

Ramirez was honored in March of this year by the Center’s Gender, Education, Advocacy and Resource (GEAR) program. He has been such a supporter of the transgender community, that GEAR has named its ally award after him: the Henry Ramirez Ally Award.

Ramirez is grateful to all supporting sponsors. Gaybingo welcomes donations of all kinds from gift certificates and concert tickets to annual cash donations.

You will have a chance to meet Ramirez this coming Saturday at The Rose Room at Station 4 in Oak Lawn, at 3911 Cedar Springs, Dallas. Feel free to live it up and wear a costume. Doors open at 5:00 p.m. and the show starts at 6:00 p.m. Guests must be at least 21 years of age to attend. The cost is $25 for 15 games of bingo. Visit Resource Center Dallas for more information.

For full story and comments, please see this link.

Edge Publication Story by Renee Baker, June 27, 2008.

Jamy Spradlin

It’s been over forty years since Martin Luther King Jr.’s embarked on his impassioned civil rights crusade, battled with police forces and ultimately was assassinated in Memphis, Tennessee. The recent beating of an African American transgender woman, Duanna Johnson, suggests that discriminatory police brutality in Memphis has not ended. WMC-TV in Memphis recently obtained surveillance footage from the reception room of a local police station, where Johnson was beaten and maced by two police officers.

It’s “every trans-person’s nightmare come true,” says Donna Rose, transgender woman and a leader in several national GLBT organizations.

Johnson was booked on prostitution charges Feb. 12 at the Shelby County Criminal Justice Center in Memphis – charges that have now been dropped because the district attorney’s office found no probable cause for arrest. Video footage shows Johnson being brutally beaten by officer Bridges McRae, while probationary officer James Swain holds her down. Michael Silverman of the Transgender Legal Defense and Education Fund says the outburst was not only unconscionable, but extreme and disproportionate to the case. Silverman says they receive many complaints of mistreatment by police, but none on this scale of brutality.

Jennifer Donnals, communications director of the Shelby County district attorney’s office, says the case is now being investigated by the Federal Bureau of Investigation. When the FBI concludes its findings, the Shelby DA’s office will evaluate them for possible state charges. The U.S. attorney’s office will further review the findings for possible federal charges.

The Memphis Police Department said in a statement that they are investigating the case. Officer Swain was immediately released from duty after the February beating incident. McRae was placed on non-enforcement status pending an administrative hearing until just yesterday, when he too was released from duty, according to WMC-TV.
Donnals says that an investigation into how the video was released to the media is being done by a separate agency, as “release of evidence to the public in this manner could jeopardize a case” against the officers if it comes to trial.

According to WMC-TV, the video was released to the media by Johnson’s attorney, Murray Wells, who felt it was an outrage that McRae was not immediately fired and no disciplinary actions were forthcoming. WMC-TV reports Memphis PD director Larry Godwin denies he was slow to hold a hearing until the tapes went public. McRae was fired just one week after the video footage was released to the media, and four months after the initial beating.

What exactly prompted the officers to beat Johnson is still unclear.

The consensus among witnesses at the event and LGBT organizations is that Johnson’s actions in no way justified the police officers’ violent actions. Johnson was said to have ignored prompts from the officer to stand up after he called her derogatory names such as “faggot” and “he-she.”

Patrick Callahan, public information officer of Transgender Community of Police and Sheriffs, an international organization of 800 transgender law enforcement officers and personnel, is very concerned about the video footage released. “The actual mistreatment or even the perceived mistreatment of a prisoner while in the custody of police officers sworn to uphold the law and to protect and serve is intolerable,” he says.

Callahan says that transgender police officers themselves have trouble transitioning in the workplace, and that many have to remain in stealth mode. “Police officers, just like the people they protect and serve, can often be very conservative people and may not easily accept change, particularly a change perceived to be as drastic as the transition from one gender to another.”

But Callahan thinks that the Memphis PD has more serious issues. “The severity of the attack on Ms. Duanna Johnson…suggests that there may be more severe issues that exist within the Memphis PD that place not only minority populations in danger, but the greater community as well.”

All those interviewed agreed education is needed. “The entire police department needs education,” Rose says. “We need to find ways of turning this inexcusable act of violence into something positive so others will not have to face the same thing.”

Silverman, who says though we will have to wait for the legal process to mature, believes that Johnson should most likely be [financially] compensated and the officers should be punished. According to WMC-TV, Johnson is making plans to sue the Memphis Police Department. Though Johnson was not available for immediate comment, Wells says he is proud of how she is handling the case.

Edge Publication Story by Renee Baker, June 20, 2008.

Jamy Spradlin

Within two hours of coming out as transgendered to her Human Resources department, corporate jet pilot Jamy Spradlin was put on paid administrative leave. To make matters worse, the Federal Aviation Administration delayed renewing her license to fly for nearly a year while they evaluated her psyche for stability after beginning hormone replacement therapy.

Spradlin is 41 years old now, though she grew up as a biological male. She loves to fly. It’s in her soul and her passion, she says. “I’ve been flying since I was 16. I got bit by the flying bug and have to do it.” She says it brings her great peace and great freedom, and she loves to share that with other people.

But her former Dallas-based corporation said no, they did not want a transgender woman flying their executives around the country. Instead of asking how they could help her transition to female, the corporation’s lawyer asked her, “How can we help you transition – away from the company?” Spradlin does not wish to disclose the name of the corporation.

Within four days of her coming out in March of 2006, the company asked Spradlin to tender her resignation. Because she was not in a financial position to fight a legal battle, she agreed to a settlement. Almost a year after being fired, Spradlin was ready to fly again, but her FAA medical certificate had lapsed. Getting that certificate reinstated has taken nearly another year, since last June. It should only have taken two hours as it had in the past, just like a driver’s license. “All of this is because I started taking estrogen,” she says.

Spradlin went to see her FAA-approved medical examiner, Dr. Gabriel Fried, M.D., in Dallas. Though she passed her First Class medical examination otherwise, when she told the examiner she was taking estrogen, Dr. Fried required two additional things: a letter from her licensed counselor describing her mental stability, and a letter from her family practitioner describing her hormone usage.

The details of what Spradlin went through to get her medical certificate back almost requires a flow chart to understand. But the FAA thinks otherwise: Les Dorr, FAA spokesperson in Washington DC, maintains that “nothing happens” when you come out as transgendered to the FAA.
Dorr says it is up to the individual medical examiner to determine whether pilots are fit to fly, but says that transgender people undergoing hormone treatment have “potentially associated medical psychiatric conditions.” However, Dorr also says FAA chief psychiatrist Charles Chesanow is not aware of any transgender pilot that has ever been denied getting a license, nor of one that has ever lost a license.

Though Dorr says the FAA leaves testing up to the medical examiner, the FAA required Spradlin to undergo extensive psychological evaluation, costing her $1400. In addition, Spradlin had to provide the FAA with a copy of her counselor’s therapeutic session notes. Spradlin says she is not aware of any non-transgender female pilots that have had to undergo such stringent evaluation when they began taking hormone replacement therapy.

Spradlin believes the system is a mess. “The whole process was utterly frustrating,” she says. “No one wanted to take responsibility.” She says that most of the issues that came up were due to “lack of communication” and “lack of understanding”. She believes that while she wasn’t personally discriminated against, the system unfairly assumes that transgender people are cognitively dysfunctional until proven otherwise. “They really didn’t have a clue, but I don’t blame them for not knowing what to do.”

Still, Spradlin remains optimistic that the FAA will eventually get it right. “You gotta laugh about it,” she says. There was a lesson in all of this, she explains, and that is patience. Even as she was a day away from getting the needed medical certificate in the end, the assigned physician granting her a medical certificate had a heart attack, causing another three week delay.

After two years of being grounded, Spradlin now has her medical certificate in hand and expects to find an industrial pilot position in the near future. She lives in Plano, Texas and is an active volunteer in the GLBT community and in her church. She is happy to have her wings back.

For full story and comments, please see this link.

An Edge Publication Story by Renee Baker, June 13, 2008

Susan Gore

A co-worker once told Dr. Susan Gore that she would burn in hell for her lifestyle. That same man, however, also said he would go to great lengths to support her equality in the workplace. While many would find these two beliefs incompatible, Gore saw it as a jumping off point for healthy communication between diverse groups of people, and proof that it’s possible to work together while still maintaining different values.

Gore, principal of the Dallas-based Mentor Group, addressed a crowd of about 50 at Sue Ellen’s nightclub in Oak Lawn on Tuesday, June 10th. Gore has been active in the gay community for over 20 years and is a consultant on diversity in the workplace. Her new book Gays, God and the Workplace: Not Mutuall Exclusive will be released this summer.

Ron Ausemus, Regional Affiliate Council Chair for Out and Equal, invited Gore to speak at the event to bring another perspective to the diversity table. “The diversity we have now is great…in the workforce, but there is still work to do,” he said. Out and Equal is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit national organization advocating for safe and equitable workplaces for GLBT people.

Gore, whose background is in social psychology, looks for ways to bring people together and find inclusion for those not generally accepted. She specifically has found that while gays and evangelicals don’t always agree on family values, they can find common ground and work together in ways that are mutually supportive in the workplace.

She realized this, she explains, when training a Human Resources trainer who bluntly told her, “I believe you are going to burn in hell for your lifestyle.” Gore, who is in a relationship with another woman and is getting married soon in San Francisco, says the HR trainer continued, “And there is one more thing…I will go to the mat for you to be treated fairly in the workplace.” It surprised Gore that someone who could stand so boldly against her sexuality could also stand up for her at the same time. The idea for her new book came from this insight into the notion of diverse people working together despite holding separate values.

Gore says her book creates “that arc” between gays, and evangelicals who are against the gay lifestyle. She says we should look for ways in our conversation “that respect religion and sexuality…it is all about communication.” Though Gore personally doesn’t regret her experience growing up as a Southern Baptist, she believes the church has caused terrible damage.

When asked how we should handle the workplace conflicts, Gore says we have to get people talking. She points to Texas Instruments as a leader in diversity, as they are one of the very few companies to have employee resource groups for Christians, Muslims and gays. It is with the formation of gay resource groups, that other religious groups feel they can form too. Gore says that religious groups are finding acceptance too, in places they are not always welcome, and that “TI had the foresight and courage” to move in this direction of allowing diversity and building upon it.

She also says we can reduce conflict by learning to speak in the language of the other person, one “they are comfortable with”. She says, for example, that being a Unitarian Universalist, she doesn’t believe in the word “sinner.” Yet, when she speaks to a religious person, she may agree, “yes, I am a sinner too” so as not to get hung up on the matter of words. “Religious language is way intense – that is the hook. But the hook is not them. It’s me.”

Gore adds that we also have to be fully part of the conversation and not project our own beliefs onto the other person. “I want to hear what they are saying, not what I think they are saying.” As with anything, she says it takes “practice, practice, practice.” She adds too, that “the job of the evangelical is to save, so we should see it that way, one of understanding. We have to meet them half way.”

Much of it boils down to fear: “People are fearful on both sides of this conversation,” she says, meaning that gays can’t forget their part too. She believes gays have to let go of the expectation that others will be afraid of us as well, such as when walking into a room full of evangelicals. “The assumption that I would be attacked is what I bring into the room, not what they bring.” Instead, perhaps we should expect allies. “We have many, many allies out there…every company has champions for you: Find them.”

Gore feels we are living in a fascinating time, and she’s optimistic about the future with a welcoming workforce. She believes that our youth are really the ones to carry us forward. “I’ve lived long enough that I see things continue to change. That’s what keeps me sane.”